Pot Vending Machines Take Root in LA
Los Angeles is introducing the marijuana vending machine to local members of medical marijuana groups. The intention of the machines is to offer group members a more anonymous and convenient way of accessing marijuana that has been medically proven to alleviate pain and other symptoms that the drug is known to suppress. If you have a hard enough time choosing between Twix and Snickers, imagine the choices this machine has to offer. However, machine users have reported two important concerns: getting mugged by the Crips or Bloods who stake out those who’ve just used the machines, and getting a rolled-up dollar bill rejected.

Study Finds School Sex Education is Lacking
Several Midwestern states’ sex education programs were recently surveyed and turned up to be inadequate by many standards. Compared to the two-thirds of high school seniors who say they are sexually active, an overwhelming majority of teachers are not trained in sex education. Furthermore, the majority of what is taught is abstinence education and a brief introduction to birth control access and condom use. It is now recommended that doctors come into schools to more effectively teach students sexual education. So let’s get this straight – over the past few years, plenty of teachers have been arrested for sleeping with their students, yet the majority of teachers aren’t even teaching them how to have safe sex? That’s not good…

China Getting Nailed…with Snow
Parts of China are getting nailed with heavy snow for the fourth week in a row, and as a result, the country is in turmoil. Last weekend, there was a 10,000 car (seriously) backup on central China’s main highway, the traffic jam went on for over 45 miles. On top of that, the railroad as shutdown because of the weather, and as it reopened, stampedes broke out and people were crushed. So far, damages are estimated to be $7.5 billion and have led to 60 deaths. I guess when you have a billion or so people, 60 isn’t so bad, but still.

Microsoft Offers Yahoo $44.6 Billion
After thinking about the idea for nearly two years, Microsoft finally put its balls on the table and offered Yahoo $44,600,000,000 as a takeover bid. The move is obviously to make run at Google, who owns/dominates the online ad revenue game. With the purchase, Microsoft hopes to offer an unmatched and unique web search and ad generation platform that would combine the strengths of both companies. Sadly, we don’t think it makes a difference, as Yahoo and Microsoft are about as cool as AOL and now Google is just going to get pissed and unleashed the 45 other products they have sitting on the backburner, all in a mission to take over the world with Apple. You heard it here first.