So even though it�s only been a legitimate spring for like three weeks, it�s now almost summer. For many students, summer means going back home to shitty things like full time jobs, household chores and those friends from high school that you can�t seem to get rid of. Worst of all, if you�re underage, drinking becomes something you actually have to try to accomplish. Now sure everyone�s got those friends that have the cool parents that let their kid�s friends drink at their house, but they�re only cool until someone comes to the party and steals all the car keys and throws a full Keystone Cube through the front window. Luckily, I put on my drinking cap and figured out the best activities that can be done while drinking, with little or no risk.

Golf
I know half of the guys and almost all the girls are thinking, �golf blows.� Well you�re right, it does. Until you play while you drink. After a couple oat sodas, swinging that club stops being frustrating and every time you send the ball 50 yards (way) right of where you wanted, it turns into a giggle fest. Who knows, you might even get good, and you could be the next John Daly (just make sure your wife can beat you up if you want to get the full JD experience).

Swimming
People are going to tell you that you shouldn�t drink and swim because it�s �dangerous� and you could �drown.� Well guess what? Screw �em. I just so happen to enjoy getting shitty drunk, stripping down to the banana hammock, climbing the fence and jumping in my neighbor�s pool. Better yet, if I�m feeling really adventurous, I�ll wait until nighttime, get real drunk and then go swim in the lake, alone, in the dark.Well, with my arm floaties, of course.

Working
We all have to get shitty summer jobs � it�s a part of life. But it doesn�t have to be lame. Whether you�re a bike messenger, garbage truck driver, a nanny, employee at Home Depot, hospital orderly, or working on that internship for a sweet job at State Farm, the only way to make work survivable is be completely plastered all the time. This makes dealing with clients, customers, bosses, coworkers, children and the lack of spider solitaire on your computer much more bearable. Trust me.

I know I only listed three things, but that�s because I want you to get creative. You�ve got a whole summer at home with nothing but lame shit going on, so you will have plenty of time to figure out other activities that would be enhanced by drinking (but yet again, what isn�t?). If you figure any out, hit us up on either of our Facebook groups. (The Booze News -or- The Booze News @ Illinois State University) If they don�t completely suck, we�ll post �em, or I�ll write it into an article, or something like that.